The Pink Package

If you read the earlier post "The Letter", then you read that my friend Katie Sorensen told her friend who runs the "Fighting Pretty" non-profit about my situation and personal battle with Thyroid cancer. Before I go into what was in that bright pink box, and what it all means to me as I struggle through the full gamut of emotions, I want to tell you a little bit about my dear friend Katie.

Justin and I met Katie many years ago when we first started dating. She was a friend of my highschool/college friend Nicole. I didn't know what I was getting into when I met Katie. Let's just say she's all THAT and then some ;) She's the fastest person on hand-crutches and wheelchair that I know, with a sense of humor to match. But she's someone with the biggest heart for others and the hurting. Over the years, she's given me rides in her car (did I mention, she's the only New Jersey driver I'll get in the car with???) watched my kids for us, brought ME meals when I've had my many surgeries and hospitalizations, served with me at my work in the men's and women's recovery programs and homeless shelters at CityTeam Ministries, taken me camping at Big Sur and given Emma and Anders wheel chair rides through Oakridge Mall. To sum it up, Katie has given her life to Christ and asked him to use her life for his purpose and will. Through all of this, she's had countless surgeries and hospitalizations in her life. She has NEVER allowed her physical health problems get in the way of doing anything. If I'm not mistaken, I think she was even the captain on the rowing team at her college!

 So pretty much, don't ever challenge this woman to an arm wrestling match, you WILL lose :) She has a heart for the hurting in Africa that are struggling with the same health issues she's faced her entire life, and as frequently as she can, returns to Africa (wheelchair and all) to help train and equip people on how to live their life to the fullest, but she also shares the gospel too. Quite frankly, I've been receiving a lot of mail lately. Care packages, scarfs, and cards galore from all over the place. I cherish and have saved each and every one! But when my Mom and I got the mail this afternoon, seeing a bright pink box in my name made me question it. I think we all know that the bright pink color is representative of the fight against Breast cancer. I don't have breast cancer, in fact there are three easter-y colors for Thyroid cancer and bright pink isn't one of them. I opened the box not knowing who it was from, or why someone thought I had breast cancer. I felt guilty, because Thryoid cancer, as involved as it is with hormones and metabolism, isn't as life threatening by far as Breast cancer is. So out dumps this beautiful tissue paper with pretty glittery ribbons and beauty products. Hair products, eye brow tatoos and other cancer-recovery related items. A special anti-scarring cream, soft cotton scarf and necklace along with a letter. The letter explained it all clearly to me. I then knew who was responsible for this pink box, and also that they knew of my story and that I didn't have Breast cancer but that even though, they knew the tolls that cancer can take on the female body and psyche. That's when I lost it folks. I hit the ground, threw my face down and hands to the sky. I can share with you all on Facebook until the cows come home about my good days and bad days, but only God, my personal Father, knows the pains and joys I face each day.

He knows my past, present and future days to come. He has delicately brought the right people in my life at the right time, with seconds to spare. He's taken me broken, sick and hurting into His embrace and through others, reminded me that A) he will always love me and think that I'm the most precious jewel B) his plans and power are far greater than anything I can comprehend and C) he can and WILL use others whether I'm as willing and able to let them into my deepest sorrows and trials. He's used strangers at church, friends of friends, family from third generations, nurses, doctors, even patients to remind me that he's got this disease in His hands and under His control. He's shown me that he'll even use my 4 year old daughter to hold my hair back when she sees me throwing up to comfort me, my husband in ways no husband should see his wife, and yet Justin will be the first to come to my side, give in to my stubborn requests of removing IV's, stitches and other crazy ideas I've had to find comfort. Heck the guy has given my nurses a break and taken me and my IV poles to the bathroom a hundred times because my sorry self refuses to let the nurses see me in such a vulnerable state. I seem to forget, that is their job, and they see this stuff day in and day out. Folks NOTHING fazes nurses. I hang around with a lot of them in Roosevelt. They are my surrogate family, and they deserve pink packages filled with a million bucks each for what they see and deal with on a daily basis but done so with grace and love. I couldn't do it, but I'm thankful for all of them. I try and bake them all cookies, send them all cards. I'm pretty well known by most of the hospital at this point as "you...again? Michelle, we have got to stop meeting like this". There is nothing that I can do to ever thank them for what they've done for me, NOTHING.

(Tears of joy, don't worry!)

So, with all of that said. Today I want to share with you love, peace and understanding that only Jesus can bring in my life. If I ever seem like I have it "together" because I'm always so happy and smiling, know that Jesus is the reason behind this smile. This joy, during sorrow, that's Jesus in my life. I could not get through ANY of what we've been through the last 4 years without my savior by my side. He's the Alpha and Omega, and I will continue spending my life, singing of his praises! I gladly open myself up to anyone who wants to sit down and talk with me about this peace. Lord knows, I couldn't have done this on my own,  and you don't have to either!

Love,
Michelle

The Letter

I'm breaking up my experience today regarding the "Pink Package" into two posts. It's just a lot to read and take in. Part of me wanted to sum up the letter I was sent. But all of it is important, and I always like to share light on great non-profits doing good in the community, in case those I know are looking for somewhere respectable and trustworthy to donate towards:

Fighting Pretty

Dear Michelle,

I hear you are quite the amazing lady!

My name is Kara Skaflestad, and I too was diagnosed with cancer. At the age of 26, I was diagnosed with Stage 3B breast cancer and went through everything from a double mastectomy, chemo, radiation, and am still on hormone therapy. Though you are going through your own journey, I can certainly relate to the emotions and craziness of what you are going through. Your friend, Katie Sorensen (whom I went to High School with!), reached out to me and told me how amazing you are, so we wanted to send you a Pretty Package in hopes that it will brighten your day!

"Fighting Pretty" is a non-profit organization that I recently started to help women like you feel strong and beautiful during and after cancer treatments. So please enjoy some of the items in this "Pretty Package" to celebrate just how amazing you are! As you will see, we've included some goodies for you...inspirational items to remind you to keep on fighting, some makeup and a scarf to help you feel fabulous, but most importantly, a pair of mini pink boxing gloves.

The story of the boxing gloves began when I was going through chemotherapy, and my best friend's mom - also a survivor - sent me a pair of mini pink boxing gloves. In her note she told me they were a symbol of strength: to always remember to never stop fighting! So I hung mine on my bedpost and looked at them every single day. About two years later, I encountered a woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer. I looked at myself and knew my fight was over, and her fight was beginning. So I sent my boxing gloves to her and she used them to stay strong and have hope that she too would get through her fight. Well, she finished her fight last year, and she is doing great! So what did she do? She sent those boxing gloves on to someone she knew battling lymphoma - all for the symbol of strength of and hope. 

So please use those pink boxing gloves as a reminder to never give up and keep on fighting your fight! And when you are all finished - and healthy, happy - you can pass them on too!

We wish you all the best Michelle, and know you are in our thoughts and prayers. And always remember, you are beautiful, fabulous and amazing! 

And if you would like to share any tips or send any pictures on how you are "fighting pretty" please email us at fightingpretty@gmail.com and we will feature them on our website to help other women!

Love always,

Kara Skaflestad

Breast Cancer Survivor

Meet Herman's Better Half, Chelsea.

Tara, Dr. Catten and I had so much fun with my surgery last time (if you have to do this stuff, at least have a good sense of humor!) that we decided to record and take pictures again. The picture isn't as clear this time, but really there wasn't much to see. What you see in the picture is the left half of my thyroid, Chelsea my marble-sized tumor and a bunch of little baby tumors that had taken over my thyroid. Now the video I find hilarious. It's a weird feeling seeing yourself "asleep" under general anesthesia, unaware of what's going on with YOUR body. Maybe I have a sick sense of humor but it cracks me up :) I hope you enjoy Tara my nurse friend who moved us here to Utah and my A-MAZING surgeon Dr. Catten. The beeping you hear momentarily is my surgeon getting close to the nerve monitor so that I don't lose my voice forever. Thank you Tara for taking care of me again and for the lovely video and photo, my dear fellow scrapbooker ;).

Thank you to EVERYONE, from all walks, for praying and caring over me and my family. I will never be able to thank you all enough for what you've done for me during this scary and crazy time in my life. We are truly blessed by each and everyone one of you! Love, Michelle

My awesome video and photo :) Hashimoto's disease, be gone!